I’m speaking words of wisdom today – “Stop trying to fix things – let go”. It doesn’t mean I always practice what I preach though, and I know this is hard for some of us, so I thought I’d reassure you that it does work, when you “let go”.
There’s been lots of times in my life when as soon as I’ve made the decision to “let go”, everything has fallen into place, I’ve felt physically and mentally better. Many of these times have been about issues that weren’t even of my making – things I couldn’t actually affect, but in my head, if I didn’t “fix” them, I couldn’t do x, y and z. Ahh, I can see you’re nodding. You’ve been there too?
Some of us pray, and/or meditate, and/or journal (write things down to get them out of your head), and/or talk the ear off a friend, to allow things out. I’m an advocate of Listening , and know that by sharing what’s in your head with someone else, will help you find your own solution to what’s holding you back.
Even when we’ve let something out, though, I’ve often found that I want to “make things better” and “fix” things. For example, when something goes a bit haywire, and not as expected, I want to tidyup loose ends, and make sure everyone’s OK. Are you like that too?
Just like the situations where other people or situations are affecting me, and I can’t do anything about it, I also know, (deep down), that I can’t make things better for others. All I can do is love and care for them, and open my ears when they want to talk. I can’t fix things for other people, as much as I want to – they have to do it for themselves, with or without my help.
I’ve had a situation this month which has really got me down, simply because I wanted to make things right for someone else. The fact that they don’t want to accept my help, or my listening ears has been hard for me to accept. I’ve tried different tactics to make things right, but nothing has worked. It was only when a friend helped me realise this, that I was able to finally “let go”. In my own way I’ve sent them love and will always be here for them if they want my help. It’s time to move on, and I’ve finally realised that this is a life lesson I need to practice ALL the time.
I know, I’m a fixer, and want life to be wonderful for everyone. That’s because I know it can be wonderful! But we, as an individual, have to believe that, and make our own decisions. I’m a true believer of “what you put out, you get back”, and I’ve been holding myself together for too long trying to fix something that isn’t mine to fix. I’ve been spending time and energy on something that I can’t actually affect!
Hmm, so you see my dilemma? I’m a carer, a fixer, and want everyone to be happy. My friend told me, “you’re a confident, empathic, talented, skillful, wise, funny, supportive, amazing, loving, caring, dynamic, wealthy feminine force in the world”. Wow. That’s been lovely to hear. But I still wanted to fix somebody else. With all these skills and talents, it’s still not enough.
I can only be me. And you can only be you. If you can learn anything from me today, it’s you can only fix things for you. Let go of things which aren’t quite right, and certainly the things you’re trying to fix in and for other people.
I’m ready to move forward with new exciting challenges and opportunities & share my love and passions with others. Are you?
If you’d like help with letting go of something, (or someone), let’s spend some time together so I can support you to stop fixing things, and let go.